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Daily Blog

Mental health links

DEPRESSION:

a. The New York Times with a tremendous review of ketamine’s success in treating depression for many. And also, the scarcity of data on its long-term effects.

In a nutshell: lots of people have treatment-resistant depression, and ketamine often provides immediate, stunning relief. But……we’re not sure what the long-term side effects are yet.

b. Two physicians talk about battling treatment-resistant depression by targeting the Glutamatergic System.

c. STUDY: “Higher white blood cell count tied to genetic depression risk.” [PHOTO above]

d. You know the saying that prisons are the new mental health institutions? Another study confirms how prevalent mental health problems are in prisons.

e. Lindsey Vonn (you know, the Olympic skier who won everything) talks about her struggle with depression (and gives tips).

f. Another STUDY further establishes the relationship between poor sleep and mental illness. The conclusion isn’t unique. There have been lots of studies suggesting this. But the study design, here, was particularly sophisticated.

Here are 8 tips for getting a good sleep from Harvard Health. 1) exercise 2) reserve your bed for sleep and sex 3) make your bedroom quiet, dark, and cool 4) start a sleep ritual 5) eat a small healthy snack if you’re hungry 6) avoid alcohol and caffeine 7) de-stress 8) get checked out for things like sleep apnea or reflux.

BIPOLAR DISORDER:

a. STUDY: We still don’t know exactly why lithium seems to work so well, but “now researchers have developed a method for imaging lithium in living cells, allowing them to discover that neurons from BD patients accumulate higher levels of lithium than healthy controls.”

b. If you have a mood disorder, you are now eligible for a Covid vaccine booster shot, as these conditions raise the risk for mortality.

ANXIETY:

a. Schitt’s Creek actor Dan Levy tells People Magazine that he experienced so much tension and anxiety during filming that he actually needed a neck brace. Wow.

Neck tension is incredibly common in people with anxiety, and here are some tips on how to relieve it. And some more.

b. The Guardian: It’s called “Text Anxiety.” Not a clinical disorder! But too many texts, emails, notifications are overwhelming a lot of people. Some good advice on how to deal with it, if you have it.

c. Beekeeping Therapy for veterans, struggling with anxiety and PTSD. This follows another recent story on equine therapy for those struggling with PTSD.

d. Live Science: “7 anxiety tips to help you everyday.” There’s nothing in there you probably don’t already know (sleep, exercise, etc). But the research studies backing up their tips are pretty interesting.

e. Covid numbers are finally falling. So is stress and anxiety among students.

PTSD:

a. STUDY: A new study of Syrian refugees suggests that the children of moms who experience PTSD may struggle with emotional processing abilities.

“Remarkably, as a mother’s PTS symptoms dropped by one point on the scale, a child’s emotional processing scores increased by the equivalent of one year of development. By contrast, fathers’ PTS symptoms were not significantly related to children’s emotional processing scores.”

Treatment is vital for both mother and children.

EATING DISORDERS:

a. Japan has seen a 60% jump in eating disorders since the start of the Covid Crisis.

b. Eating disorders are common among veterans — attributed to trauma, sustaining military weight requirements, and the notion that going without food is a sign of strength.

SCHIZOPHRENIA:

a. STUDY: “Digital Medicine System may reduce schizophrenia symptoms beyond the effects of oral pharmacotherapy alone.”

OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER:

a. STUDY: Need of Approval Predicts OCD Diagnosis. “Results showed lower levels of confidence and higher levels of attachment anxiety among patients with OCD….. higher need of approval most strongly predicted OCD diagnosis compared with other attachment factors.”

b. Rates of OCD among adults and children have surged during the Covid Crisis.

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VERSE: “They encouraged them to continue in the faith, reminding them that we must suffer many hardships to enter the kingdom of God,” — Acts 14:42

MUSIC: From Ennio Morricone, one of the most sublime pieces of music you will ever hear. In the best western you will ever see.

November 5, 2021

Rosamond Herklots’ call to reject bitterness

written by Christian Heinze

Although written in 1966, it sounds and reads like something from many centuries past.

Which isn’t a good or bad thing, it just means you have to think longer about each line (and spending a bit longer on anything is a good thing).

Rosamond Herklots’ song: (Why, oh, why, isn’t there more about this amazing woman and poet, online)?

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“Forgive our sins as we forgive”

‘Forgive our sins as we forgive,’
you taught us, Lord, to pray,
but you alone can grant us grace
to live the words we say.

How can your pardon reach and bless
the unforgiving heart,
that broods on wrongs and will not let
old bitterness depart?

In blazing light your cross reveals
the truth we dimly knew:
what trivial debts are owed to us,
how great our debt to you!

Lord, cleanse the depths within our souls,
and bid resentment cease;
then, bound to all in bonds of love,
our lives will spread your peace.

*****************************************************************************************************************************

Think of those lines: “What trivial debts are owed to us, how great our debt to you.”

And: “How can your pardon reach and bless the unforgiving heart that broods on wrongs and will not let old bitterness depart?”

I’m going to try (and fail) to read that last line every day.

There’s a lot of bitterness in the world, at large, right now, and perhaps in your personal life.

Mine too.

But harboring that sin is perhaps the easiest and most pernicious, because it comes from a place of being wronged and so we’re likely to hold onto it more tightly than other sins, as we mistake it for “righteousness” when really it’s the prelude to self-righteousness and the big, horrible opera, as well.

God knows I’ve indulged, and still indulge the bitter, and it’s only when I look at Christ that I realize how wrong and ridiculous it is.

He died, willingly, for a world that wronged him, and did so saying, “Father, forgive them.”

How can I make myself higher than Jesus, which is what I do when I’m bitter?

I don’t talk much about sin here because Christians with mental health challenges are particularly prone to self-loathing.

And when we fixate on sin, a lot of us talk ourselves out of Christ’s love for us. Which I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want us to do.

But it’s good to think about our sin of bitterness — not to condemn ourselves — but because it stops us from condemning others. Whether it’s condemning our spouses, our families, or our neighbors with the yard signs we don’t like.

And it’s because we’ve forgotten the theology of our fallibility, our personal sin, God’s mercy towards us, and the practice that should come from those three things — humility.

We will never let go of our self-righteousness until we see your own unrighteousness. (When we meet Jesus, I don’t think he’ll do a slow clap and say, “Wow. You were right on a lot.”).

Yet we slow clap our rightness all the time, don’t we? In our marriage, our friendships, our politics.

That’s what leads to our bitterness. Over marriage, friendship, and politics.

This is a terrible time of bitterness in America, and unfortunately, the evangelical church is feasting on it and actually promoting it. It’s like a virus that replicates and spreads, and it’s infected the entire church.

But it’s killing us, both spiritually, and as a group of people that are supposed to represent God’s love.

If there’s one fight Christians should actually be a part of in this world, it’s the fight against bitterness, the fight against our lack of humility and our self-righteousness.

(And I write this to remind myself of my own bitterness, not to put myself above it. Ask my wife about how well I deal with bitterness).

Professor Michael Hawn has written a great history of the song, and includes this beautiful anecdote.

I was in South Africa in 1998 during the presidency of Nelson Mandela. Arch Bishop Desmond Tutu presented President Mandela with the bound volumes containing the results of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission. I was sitting among a group of black and white Methodist ministers watching this historic occasion on television as Tutu referenced one of the many important revelations that took place during the process that the Commission hoped would lead to healing and hope for South Africa. At one point, Tutu recalled a black woman who asked him, “Who murdered my husband?” Tutu responded, “We do not know.” She was insistent, however, and continued, “I must know who killed my husband.” Again, the patient Tutu responded, “I’m sorry, but we may never know who killed your husband.” Still her question persisted. Finally, Tutu asked, “My dear lady, why must you know who killed your husband?” She responded simply and quietly, “So I can forgive him.”

I’ve included, at the bottom, Koine’s version of the song, which sounds a bit like it’s from a Sergio Leone film.

November 3, 2021

An excellent article on OCD

written by Christian Heinze

Adelaide Miller has a terrific read, with first-hand testimonials, on living with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.

There are some gripping examples, but the piece brings up a couple, really important points.

a) OCD isn’t always just about Howard Hughes-ian handwashing, organizing things perfectly, arranging, contamination, and all the other popular representations.

You can have OCD about anything.

b) Often, OCD resides entirely in your head without the attendant rituals.

It’s unwanted and intrusive mental thoughts that refuse to give your mind a break.

Consequently, you can live quite a normal life, on the outside, while you’re absolutely tortured, inside.

No one sees you engage in all the physical rituals that accompany some forms of OCD, and so you can live a long time as a “normal person” without a proper diagnosis.

All forms of OCD are brutal, but this a particularly difficult kind because, as the article notes, the longer we go undiagnosed, the harder it is to eventually treat.

I started having obsessive thoughts about going to hell at 4 years old, but there were no external rituals to ease that thought, and so no one recognized my OCD the way they would if I were obsessive about hand-washing.

Eventually, that mental obsession ceased, but there were always replacements, lined up on the bench, ready for their starring role.

Now I want to say something that the article doesn’t address.

What role does Christianity (if any) play in this?

Well, some Christians would counter: “Well, if you’re having an unwanted, intrusive thought, just think about Scripture.”

There’s a problem with that.

You can fixate on any number of Scriptural issues to the point where it becomes severely intrusive, unwanted, and debilitating.

God’s sovereignty and man’s free will? It’s almost a cliché to bring that one up, but of all the books and countless perspectives I’ve read, none has come close to resolving the mystery.

“Examine yourself, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves”. 2 Corinthians 13:5. Thanks, Paul. That’s been the bane of Christians with OCD for thousands of years.

Jesus, in Matthew 5: “If you are sued in court and your shirt is taken from you, give your coat too.”

Yes, he’s laying out a principle, but how do we live out that principle? A lot of Christians are willing to sweep that under the rug as a conscience-issue, but people with OCD don’t sweep anything under the rug.

There is no rug.

The point is that if you direct Christians with OCD towards Scripture, they’ll just apply their mental (or pure-O) OCD in that direction.

The problem isn’t Scripture, the problem is OCD, and you can’t treat OCD with Scripture, because there are 66 books in the Bible, with innumerable puzzling stories and verses that have inspired fierce theological debates, countless denominations, and actual catapult-and-sword, nation-state wars over interpretation.

I love my Bible.

Therein lie the words, the being, the salvation of Christ, my Lord and Savior, and the one who makes this whole mess of life worth it because there’s a resurrection where our minds and bodies will finally be free and perfect and at rest.

But as someone with OCD, it’s also inspired sometimes-debilitating “religious scrupulosity,” which Jesus never intended. He said his burden is light.

It’s not Christ’s fault, it’s the fact we all live with challenges from a fallen world.

So if you “treat OCD with Scripture,” you’ll have OCD over your Christianity just like some people have it over contamination or literally anything, because you can have OCD about anything.

c) If any ritual, if any thought, if anything is causing you severe distress, talk to a doctor. Just get checked out.

In Miller’s article, she interviews Dr. David Cooper, who says that early treatment is vital:

“Biologically, brain imaging studies have found that brain changes related to OCD, structure and circuitry, increase with age,” Mr Cooper said.
“The longer someone lives with OCD, the more their brains might change to support its processes.
“Socially, the longer someone lives with OCD the more likely they are to organise their lives to accommodate it.
“Family members often end up participating in compulsions. People will choose careers, friends or activities that allow them to avoid triggers or perform compulsions.
“The way their lives are organised around OCD serves to maintain the disorder.

Finally, Miller points out some forms of treatment for therapy, which include Exposure and Response Prevention, Acceptance Commitment Therapy, and/or medication.

I’d like to add one more thing — last year, researchers discovered a potentially fascinating and wonderful new way of treating OCD by treating our immune system. It’s still far too early to be practiced, clinically, but the science is promising and, I hope, offers some comfort that, yet again, we can trace these mental challenges to our bodies and the way they malfunction.

For example, this is a brain with OCD, courtesy of this study.

It’s not your fault. And there are far more people with this out there than you think (and you – and I — think a lot).

[Photo: Pexels, free stock photographs]

November 2, 2021

Amy Simpson with a good reminder on antidepressants

written by Christian Heinze

Author Amy Simpson, who wrote the award-winning book, Troubled Minds, with a very good reminder for Christians who are leery of antidepressants.

Simpson writes (emphasis added).

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“I recently read an article by a Christian writer questioning whether Christians should take antidepressants, because emotional pain can cause us to lean more heavily on Christ.

Physical pain can have the same effect, but when I had back surgery, no one questioned whether I should all ow the surgeon to use general anesthesia.

…..Yes, severe emotional pain and other symptoms of mental illness can drive us closer to our savior.

They can also drive us to cause serious harm to the people around us, reject our faith, believe lies and commit suicide.”

*****************************************************************************************************************************

End quote (You can read my interview with Amy here).

That last part is so good.

If you feel that clinical depression and anxiety are drawing you closer to Christ, okay, but if you have the symptoms, then by definition, they’re probably pushing you farther away from those around you.

When I’m depressed or anxious, it’s much harder to be a loving, engaged dad and husband. That’s not just me. It’s a symptom of the disease.

Will I pray more? Perhaps. Sometimes.

But will I be kinder, more involved as a parent, husband, and overall person? Probably not.

And that’s what God wants from me. How I treat others, not how much I pray.

Depression isolates us (there goes the engaging part), anxiety makes us irritable (there goes the loving part) and depression and anxiety immobilize us (there goes our life).

So if there’s treatment (talk to a doctor first), getting it seems the most loving, Christian thing to do.

I’ve known so many who began flourishing again after total immobilization.

Pastor Kirby Smith is a particularly good example of this.

In our interview last year, he talks candidly, in gripping detail, about being utterly paralyzed in his church office, praying for death, waking up with panic attacks so severe he didn’t know he could survive them. Losing his church, nearly his mind. All that.

And then he got treatment (ECT and medicine), and now he’s pastoring again, doing great things, and not living in misery.

Treatment doesn’t just save the victim. It helps everyone around the victim.

It’s also important to note that there’s a difference between grief and depression. Every human grieves. And in that, we often do see the Father closer.

But depression is another devil entirely because it lies to you about everything. Your brain works against you.

It’s nearly impossible to see anything good about The Good News, because it’s impossible to see good in anything, and even if there is something good, it’s not for you.

In her book Companions in the Darkness, author Diana Gruver notes that the deeply depressed, Christian poet William Cowper told others the Good News of Christ was for everyone but himself.

That was his depression preaching a lie.

It certainly wasn’t Christ, who told all to come.

The only good I’ve seen from my own depression, anxiety, and OCD isn’t a closer walk with God, it’s the fact that I can now say “I know” and really know when I talk with people who have those conditions.

And if you have it, that’s probably the same for you.

When you talk with others, there’s an instant connection, a shared misery that can actually promote a smile — like two soldiers who talk lovingly of home and how they’ll get there, while they’re at battle, freezing and a second from death.

Pastor Scott Sauls says that sharing his battle with depression/anxiety brought him closer to his congregation. They now recognized him as someone who truly understood, and that’s one of the beautiful things about Christ. His time in the Garden is far more compelling to humans than his Transfiguration. We understand the first, the second feels almost fantastical because we’ve never seen or known it.

So I’m not saying that good can’t come from depression or anxiety in a weird, roundabout way. Hopefully, something good — at some point — will come from it.

But as Simpson noted, it’s also quite possible it will lead to suicide, the dissolution of marriage, the complete withering of spiritual growth, and total heartbreak for everyone involved in the situation.

If taking a pill makes that less likely, well, I’m going to.

And here are two things that can be true at the same time: Medicine can save your life, but only Christ can save your soul.

We wouldn’t bat an eyelash if someone said that about heart surgery, but for some reason, Christian resistance to the medical component of mental health remains astonishingly strong and truly damaging to both the victim and those around them.

If you’re currently struggling, and want to know more…..

Here’s a psychiatrist near you.

And a therapist.

October 30, 2021

STUDY: How PTSD and sexual abuse can change brain function

written by Christian Heinze

A brand new study from researchers at Medical University of South Carolina explains at least one way the brain changes in adults who have experienced PTSD or sexual abuse.

In this particular cohort, researchers found “reduced brain connectivity in the attention systems known as the ventral and dorsal attention network.”

If you’re into the neuroscience of it, you can read more about the circuitry here, but this explains why victims in this group have such difficulty with focus, and how severely their trauma can impact their lives.

Lead author, Dr. Kathleen Crum, explains:

“Individuals with PTSD have difficulty disengaging attention from threat-related cues, including cues that remind them of their traumatic experiences,” explained Crum. “Individuals with PTSD may also tend to interpret neutral cues as threat-related. Collectively, these problems affect their ability to direct their attention to the task at hand in their everyday lives.”

One of my favorite books is by the acclaimed neuroscientist and Christian, Dr. Matthew Stanford, Grace for the Afflicted.

Protestant Work Ethic American Christians are, unfortunately, very prone to the mentality of, “Oh, shake it off, work it off, stop playing the victim, and just move on with your life.”

But for those who’ve experienced abuse, those with PTSD, those with other mental health challenges — it’s not a matter of “willpower.”

Our brains are different.

We would never tell someone in a wheelchair, “Oh, just get up off that thing!”

So why would we tell that to someone who’s experienced terrible abuse, or who has PTSD? Or any other mental health challenge?

That would be just cruel.

And unfortunately, countless Christians have gotten that treatment from churches.

A Lifeway Study found that 25% of Christians with mental health challenges have switched churches because they felt so unwelcome in their current one.

In his book, Grace for the Afflicted, Dr. Stanford (read our interview here) goes through major mental health conditions, explains what’s going on in the brain, and gently prods the Christian community to show the kindness and empathy we often lack.

Now, back to the study and the hopeful news.

The researchers found that the hormone, oxytocin, increases brain connectivity in those systems damaged by the abuse and thus may be a way of helping treat survivors of abuse and those with PTSD.

More research is needed, but this is yet another invitation for all of us to show what Christians should really be — advocates for the hurting, graceful towards the struggling, and always mindful that what right do we have to boast about anything?

What right do we have to tell someone to “shake it off” when every “good thing” we’ve ever experienced or “done” is not from us? If someone has, in the context of this study, a brain with “normal” brain connectivity in these regions, did they create it? If someone had a spectacular childhood, did they pick their home?

Every good thing is a gift, and we should be the most humble and kind of all people, because our theology rests on it.

[Photo: Pexels]

October 29, 2021

Johnny Cash: “Why me, Lord?”

written by Christian Heinze

We ask that question from both sorrow and happiness, don’t we?

Sorrow: “Why this darkness, Lord, over me?”

Happiness: “Why me, Lord? Why your mercy, salvation, and everything else for me? It’s preposterous, this mercy, but I’ll take it and praise you.”

The answer in sorrow and happiness is the same: Jesus loves us, is for us beyond our wildest imagination, and “all is grace.”

When we’re sad, those words often fail to move us, but it doesn’t change the fact that Jesus is always moving for us.

Now for those of us who battle mental health challenges, this particular lyric from Kris Kristofferson is something to remember:

“Maybe, Lord, I can show someone else

What I’ve been through myself

On my way back to you.”

Tell someone struggling with the dark that you struggle with it, too, and in that shared moment, something light might be born.

October 28, 2021

STUDY: Mirtazapine shouldn’t be used for dementia

written by Christian Heinze

One of dementia’s most challenging symptoms is increased agitation.

My dad passed away from dementia, so we all saw the sudden agitation, first-hand. Our normally placid father suddenly became extraordinarily anxious and difficult to manage.

And that’s really common for people suffering with dementia.

Doctors have options, but they often first turn to an antipsychotic like benzodiazepines. However, they sometimes come with significant risks for the elderly — particularly, falls. Falls lead to fractures, and fractures at that age, in that condition, can often send patients on a quick, downward spiral.

So quite a few doctors have turned to the antidepressant, mirtazapine (brand name: Remeron) in the hopes that it will help calm the extreme agitation without some of the negative effects of benzodiazepines.

The only problem?

A new study published in The Lancet suggests that mirtazapine doesn’t work for agitation in dementia.

In fact, it’s “possibly more likely to be associated with mortality than no intervention at all.”

In this particular study, researchers found that there were more deaths in the mirtazapine group than the control group, which got a sugar pill. However, the difference was only “marginally statistically significant.”

Meanwhile, there was no difference between the two groups in agitation and anxiety.

The researchers concluded that there’s no good reason to give mirtazapine to those suffering with dementia, and that it should “no longer [be] used to treat agitation in patients with dementia.“

Now, this blog is a pro-antidepressant space.

I’ve relied on antidepressants for years, and thank God for meds. Antidepressants can be a huge, life-changing and saving gift. And Christians are, unfortunately, often quick to use any study like this to condemn antidepressants, entirely.

But this study doesn’t have anything to do with patients who don’t have dementia, and take mirtazapine.

In fact, mirtazapine has proven extremely effective in treating depression and other conditions for many.

But if your loved one is suffering with agitation from dementia, it might be a good idea to show your doc this new study. Sometimes it can take awhile for the latest research to filter down.

Over at Harvard Health, Dr. Stephanie Collier has a tremendous read on the latest research on how to handle agitation in dementia patients.

According to research, “multidisciplinary care, massage and touch therapy, and music combined with massage and touch therapy” are superior to pharmacological treatments in handling agitation and anxiety in dementia patients.

Read Dr. Collier’s whole evidence-based-piece for some tips on how to incorporate multidisciplinary care.

Of course, every situation is different, but if you’re going through the enormous challenge of taking care of a loved one with dementia, it’s a good informational supplement.

October 25, 2021

STUDY: Yup, nature can really help anxiety

written by Christian Heinze

This is one of those “Sleep improves your mood” type of studies, where you can easily guess the outcome, but the fact that it’s scientifically-established is wonderful — both for mental health professionals who offer counsel and people like you and me.

A new study from The University of York found that folks who spent between 20 and 90 minutes per day in nature for 8-12 weeks experienced mental health benefits, including improved mood and less anxiety.

So what qualifies as spending time in nature?

Just getting outside.

The study noted that gardening and exercise seemed particularly beneficial, and doing nature-based activities with people was even better.

One point I’d like to add: Scientists have found that flow-based activities also contribute to well-being and decreased levels of anxiety.

Flow-based activities tend to be totally absorbing and something you really enjoy. It could be playing the piano, gardening, carpentry, and the list goes on.

Of course, you can do flow-based activities in nature or outside nature, but it might be that gardening and exercise were more helpful in this study than simply walking by yourself because of the flow-based nature. That’s speculation.

You can read here for more on the science behind flow.

During the lockdown, we spent a lot more time outdoors than normal, and the best moments were when my wife and I were in a playing groove with our kids (by “playing groove” I mean, not having to intervene in arguments or pick which game to play. You all agree on something, you totally absorb yourself in that, you’re in nature, and you wonder why you’d ever need an antidepressant. And then you come inside, and remember).

Unfortunately, our modern life doesn’t really reward going outdoors and it can be really difficult for many to actually do it.

But… it’s worth a shot, and does, indeed, help me. Not enough to toss my meds. But enough to be a really good supplement to them.

October 18, 2021

STUDY: Eating mushrooms linked to lower risk of depression

written by Christian Heinze

A new study in the Journal of Affective Disorders found that those who ate mushrooms frequently were much less likely to show symptoms of depression than those who didn’t eat mushrooms, at all.

And it’s not just because the mushroom-aficionados had a healthier lifestyle. Researchers control for those types of things.

So the question is why?

According to the study’s lead researcher, mushrooms are high in the amino acid, ergothioneine, which you guessed it — is a powerful anti-inflammatory compound.**

The theory is that this helps reduce oxidative stress, which in turn might reduce symptoms of depression (read here for the link between oxidative stress and depression).

Writing for Eating Well, Leah Goggins notes that there are other ways mushrooms might help our mental health. They tend to be really high in potassium, which has been linked to reduced depressive symptoms.

They’re also great for your gut, and the link between gut health and mental health is well-established.

So if you can tolerate them (I can’t, unfortunately), mushrooms aren’t a bad idea.

However, as I’ve noted a million times, don’t feel bad if these dietary tweaks don’t work for you.

I’ve tried numerous diets — not for depression but for my Crohn’s disease — and they’re all anti-inflammatory, and I haven’t noticed any difference in my symptoms of depression or anxiety.

But lots of people have! And lots of people haven’t. But even if it doesn’t help your depression or anxiety, you’ll probably be healthier and that’s good.

The gold standard for treating depression and anxiety is still medicine and therapy, and Psychology Today has a great link for finding a psychiatrist or therapist based on zip code.

**The Journal of Nutritional Science has a fascinating article on ergothioneine, which is gaining interest among academics for its potential to “prevent or mitigate chronic diseases of aging.”

And mushrooms are “by far” the leading dietary source of ergothioneine.

[Photo: A bowl of mushrooms. Pexels]

October 17, 2021

A pastor’s “living nightmare” and how it can tighten the congregational bond

written by Christian Heinze

Please read my new interview with Pastor Scott Sauls, and also jump into his really gripping account of a “living nightmare” episode from his Gospel Coalition piece, “Anxiety and Depression, My Strange Friends.”

It’ll make you feel less alone, and it’ll offer some comfort.

Sauls:

How bad was the living nightmare? I could not fall asleep for two weeks straight. Even sleeping pills couldn’t calm the adrenaline and knock me out, which only made things worse. At night I was terrified of the quiet, knowing I was likely to lose another all-night battle with insomnia. I was terrified of the sunrise, an unwelcome reminder that another day of impossible struggle was ahead of me. I lost nearly 35 pounds in two months. I couldn’t concentrate in conversations. I found no comfort in God’s promises from Scripture. I was unable to pray anything but “Help” and “Please end this.”

Sauls goes on to note something that I think many of us can relate to — our affliction has a way of making us feel completely, totally, absolutely, 100% helpless.

And that’s when we’re most likely to turn to Jesus. In fact, that’s when anyone is most likely to turn to Jesus.

Now, I don’t want to give a pep talk (pep write would it be?) on all this, because this beast often makes us incapable of even seeing Jesus, of even believing he loves us.

In fact, that’s its worst trick. It makes us think that all the good stuff about Jesus is for others, not ourselves.

So I want to be true to the fact that if you feel 100% overwhelmed in your despair and trapped by your anxiety, don’t put pressure on yourself to somehow see Jesus. He may remain obscured, for whatever reason, although he promises he is right there. Always.

That’s why I think medication is such a crucial piece of this component, as well. When you’re dour and pessimistic on everything, you’ll probably be dour and pessimistic about Christ’s love. And medication has often shown itself effective at reliving that mindset.

In fact, for many, medication is the most crucial piece in treating this disease, because this disease is, well, a disease, and there are all sorts of methods doctors use in treating disease. Medicine, surgery, diet, exercise, and then of course, our spirituality to help us in that dimension.

Now back to Sauls’ article.

He notes that sharing his struggles openly has tightened the bond with his congregation, and that’s a message church leaders desperately need to hear.

“Recently a member in our church (where I’ve been senior pastor for two years) told me he thinks I am a great preacher . . . and he is entirely unimpressed. He told me that the moment he decided to trust me—the moment he decided I was his pastor—was when I shared openly with the church that I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression and have seen counselors for many years.”

That is beyond true.

If you’re a church leader reading this and on the fence about opening up, you’d be amazed at how many people in your congregation will say, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

The church is full of people struggling with these battles, just waiting for someone to speak up.

The pressure to be perfect, to always “be growing,” to always be at the top of your spiritual game — man, it’s soul-draining.

There are many reasons young people are leaving the church, but I believe a huge driver is the fact that from the moment you step into one of these places, everything appears manufactured, and for a generation struggling to find truth, a prim and proper façade isn’t going to cut it.

And one more note: if you’re struggling with any mental health condition, please talk to a psychiatrist! It’s not hyperbole to say it could be the difference between life and death. I wish I had made that phone call sooner.

[Photo: Ponta Delgada, Portugal. Pexels]

October 15, 2021

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