Paul Miller, in his book A Praying Life:
“An interviewer once asked Edith Schaeffer… ‘Who is the greatest Christian woman alive today?’ She replied, ‘We don’t know here name. She is dying of cancer somewhere in a hospital in Indian.”
No matter where you are, no matter what you feel you have or haven’t done for Christ, remember, that Christ doesn’t measure us the way the world or the church measures us.
He measures us through what his eyes see, not the “failures” the world sees, or the worst we want to believe in ourselves.
No matter who you are, where you are, don’t feel forgotten just because someone has forgotten you.
The famous preachers everyone raves over? The ones you must think, “They’re actually accomplishing stuff for Christ.” Sure, they are. And I thank God for them. Deeply. But do you think God is impressed by the crowds they draw? No, he looks at the heart the minister has.
We know this from Christ’s explicit and implicit teachings (“last is first” theme, his numerous parables, the people he honored etc), and we also know this from one of the verses I have to keep in mind a lot, as someone who’s keenly aware of his own failures, smallness, and penchant for guilt at “not doing enough for him.”
Psalm 147:10-11: “He takes no pleasure in the strength of a horse or in human might. No, the Lord’s delight is in those who fear him, those who put their hope in his unfailing love.”
Now, my heart is often far from him, I often lose hope in his unfailing love, and oh Lord, many times I live with indifference to his Lordship.
But… no matter where you are – if you are confined to a hospital bed, if you are confined to a restricted life where you’re unseen, and even if you’re suffering from guilt over your failures or your sins: This moment is this moment. And you and I can turn our hearts towards him, and that’s all God wants. That’s where it all begins and even if it’s in the midst of ending, of dying in that lonely hospital room, you have already become great in God’s kingdom.
Don’t listen to Christians who rebuke you for not “doing enough.” Christ says, “I did enough. Now let’s build our relationship.”
If you’re depressed, or struggle with any aspect of mental health…
For readers from the United States….
Find a psychiatrist here.
Find a therapist here.
For readers, internationally, seek help from a local resource.
For salvation, Christ and Christ alone.