I’m not going to “rise up on the wings of eagles” you, or “be joyful in the Lord” you…..or deploy any of the verses that Happy Christians often unleash like a heavenly onslaught of smiling tanks in El Alamein.
Instead, I’m going to share, perhaps, the most meaningful verse in my mental health saga, and hope it can be of some help to you, as well.
Psalm 116:10, in four translations:
“I believed in you, so I said, ‘I am deeply troubled, Lord’.” (NLT)
“I trusted in the Lord when I said, ‘I am greatly afflicted’.” (NIV)
“I believed, even when I spoke, ‘I am greatly afflicted’.” (ESV)
“I believed, therefore I spoke, ‘I am greatly afflicted’.” (NKJV)
That’s a lot of translations, saying the same thing — “My faith makes me tell God, “I’m really really really losing it’.”
Now here’s why that’s a big deal.
Pastor Generic would probably preach a sermon saying, “When you’re deeply troubled, just have faith in God.”
And there’s nothing wrong with that. If your faith relieves your mind, that’s wonderful.
But what is David (or possibly Hezekiah) saying here?
He’s saying the reverse is true, as well, and thus, giving us another part of the Christian experience.
Here, David’s faith provokes him to cry, “I am deeply troubled.”
It doesn’t make him say, “Okay, now I feel better.”
David is saying: “God, I believe in you so much, I have so much faith in you, that I’m going to tell you how troubled I am.”
Does that scenario resonate with you more than the Christian Generic, “My faith snapped me out of my trouble”?
Boy, it sure does me.
When I’m deeply troubled, I’d love for my faith to instantly make me feel better, but do you know what’s also a “great faith” thing — getting on our knees, and saying, “God, I’m troubled!”
That’s not a lack of faith. That’s faith itself, according to this verse.
Alpha Optimist Christian would rewrite Psalm 116:10, backwards: “I was deeply troubled, so I just believed in God.”
But David says our faith doesn’t have to look or feel like immediate relief.
Instead, it can look more like prayer that is provoked by worry, by feeling troubled.
In other words, “living in faith” doesn’t mean that you now feel relief, calm, an “it is well with my soul” peace that passes understanding.
Living in faith can just as easily mean troubled prayer.
As Gethsemane neared, Jesus said much the same thing in John 12, “Now my soul is troubled.”
And what did he do?
He fell to his knees a lot over the coming days, and begged his Father to save him, if possible, from the suffering ahead.
It was Psalm 116:10, in narrative: Jesus had total faith in the Father, and so he told him, “I am deeply troubled.”
Did that fix things?
Well, from John 12 onward, things just got more mentally taxing, more distressing for Jesus, but he continued to pray.
And it was all based on perfect faith — a faith that didn’t relieve the “deeply troubled” part.
Now imagine Alpha Christian Optimist doing to Jesus what they do to us when we’re depressed: “Hey, Jesus, don’t be so troubled. You’re too blessed to be stressed because in three days, this will all be done and you’re gonna be totally glorified. Get some perspective!”
Well, yes, Jesus knew exactly the coming glory, he trusted perfectly in his Father, and yet he was “deeply troubled.”
And as someone who went through this sludge far deeper than we ever could, he knows that when we are deeply troubled, it’s not because of a lack of faith.
If it were, then Jesus would have sinned.
And so when we come to our Father, when we say, “I’m scared, I’m anxious, I’m out of my mind with terror” — that is faith.
That is faith because unless you believe in God, unless you believe he’s here, listening, and caring, you would never spend your time talking to him about your deep troubles.
Does the world do that? No. Only your faith in Christ provokes it.
So next time you’re deeply troubled, don’t beat yourself over the head and say: “IF ONLY I HAD MORE FAITH!”
No, because if you’re praying during your trouble, then that is great faith.
So keep Psalm 116:10 handy, “I believed, even when I spoke, ‘I am greatly afflicted’.”
[Photo: Jimmy Stewart, It’s a Wonderful Life]
[And P.S. If you’re struggling with depression, here’s a link to a psychiatrist and therapist near you].